Saturday, June 19, 2010

They're Just New Shoes

Today is the day.  We are headed to the mall to buy Annie-Mae her first pair of shoes.  I've been counting her steps for weeks, it seems, in anticipation of this very shopping trip.  No new shoes until she takes at least 10 steps in a row and walks at least as much as she crawls: that's my rule.

Now that the day has finally arrived, I find myself getting a little misty-eyed.  Her first year passed so quickly and my memory seems to be fuzzy.  I don't know if it's just part of what happens when you have older kids, but it seems that I was so busy going from ballet to basketball and doing homework that I feel I missed some of her baby days.  She's growing up right before my eyes.

She hasn't been the easiest baby of the four.  She had problems from the start with breastfeeding and taking a bottle.  She was weak and lazy- her suckle, that is. We must have tried 5 kinds of bottles before we found one that she would take easily.  Turns out, the cheapest bottle with the drippiest nipple was the one she liked best.  We barely made it a month on the breast.

Next we had problems with the formula.  We switched 3 times before we had the Rain Soft people out to test the water.  All the kids were breaking out in severe eczema and she was so fussy we had to walk and bounce her constantly.  After we had the new water treatment installed, she was immediately better.  The kids' skin cleared up also.  Clean water- what a blessing!

She refused to sleep through the night on a consistent basis.  We never knew what we were going to get when we went to sleep.  On top of that, she was not much of a napper either.  She seemed to sleep best when I had to wake her up early to go to ballet or pick up the other kids from preschool.  Oh, the torture of waking a sleeping baby!  She absolutely refused to sleep anywhere but her crib, so there was no hope of extended errand running.  If I could have dropped out of everything this year, I certainly would have!

This past year it seems she was cutting a new tooth every week.  One would break through and then I'd see another one coming in.  This made for an extremely cranky baby and a mom running short on patience.  No, she was not my easiest baby.

But here she is, walking.  Wearing shoes. This year has passed so quickly, I barely remember anything.  But I do remember the day she was born.  How happy I was to see her!  I was instantly in love.  I had a healthy dose of drugs, so there wasn't that, "Thank-God-that's-over-with" feeling.  In fact, I didn't feel a thing.  The doctor directed me to pull her out the rest of the way and that did it.  I was head-over-heels in love with her.

It's bittersweet to watch her grow up.  Every step she takes is a step away from me.  Before I know it...well, let's not get ahead of ourselves.

My four are so very precious to me. Will there be another little soul for me to love one day?   My answer, "God's will be done."  In the meantime, all I can do is love the children I've been given, try not to take them for granted, teach them about God and raise them to be saints.


  1. AnonymousJune 24, 2010

    beautiful ending to a wonderful post Mary. You REALLY get it don't you!

  2. I'm blushing. Thank you, I'm humbled.

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"Let your speech always be with grace, as though seasoned with salt, so that you will know how you should respond to each person." ~Colossians 4:6 (NASB)